Tuesday, April 19, 2011

(The Gifts of) Gavel and Gab

So I am reading this book my sister Dolly sent to me. It is called, “The Gift in You.” It is interesting because it combines something I read about previously, neuroscience (the study of the brain), and a profile test I actually took on the Tony Robbins website regarding personal strengths… primarily as they relate to work, business, and general life goals. This book is written by a Christian woman who studied neuroscience and how it reflects the descriptions of our design and gifts in God's word.

Some of you who read this may notice that I often come across as a BIG judgemental jerk.

There are 7 areas of the brain, according to this book (and actually they pretty much match the other profile test, though it is from a secular source) and it says we will all have a unique combination and sequence in the way we process thoughts and the way we are gifted. Our unique design affects how we view things and also how we contribute to this little ole' world. Guess what my top one was on both? INTRA personal areas..... related to deep introspection. The description says things like, "prefers solitude" and "thinks about the meanings behind things and examines her own thoughts and emotions."

My LOWEST score was INTERpersonal areas.... all things related to social stuff. It doesn't mean I am inept at or incapable of functioning in that area, it is just not what I prefer or what comes comfortably in many cases. It can tire me or stress me in the same way that too much noise does. I like some music some time, and during those times I love it, really; but I like quiet the majority of the time. That's how I am with people too.

The other seven areas were scaled, providing an accurate assessment of me within the framework's limitations. The book is going through much more than the quiz, but this isn't a synopsis, so if you are interested check it out.

I am writing about it because THIS BLOG STRESSES ME OUT. I have very strong opinions about things and everytime I write what I think, I realize that 90% of the people who read it will be offended. As soon as I publish something I think of this person or that person and what they will think or how they will feel....because I often come across as SOOOO judgemental. Someone very close to me has called me that my whole life as I have tried to help her see that some of her choices are wrong and harmful. The thing is, they ARE wrong and harmful and I love her so I want her to stop. Trying to sugarcoat something so that everyone feels warm and fuzzy and yet is still motivated to change would fall, I believe, into the interpersonally gifted person's area. At least I hope. That's right, right? Please tell me that's right. When I try to do it my whole self sort of cramps.

Some of the other related important points in the book mention focusing on your strengths and not your weaknesses.

God's word says in Hebrews 4:12:

For the word of God is alive and active. Sharper than any double-edged sword, it penetrates even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow; it judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart.

I believe that we are to use the wisdom given to us in God's word to make clearcut decisions and daily, as we grow in our knowledge of it, to make changes accordingly. That is my area of strength. Please understand that if you are to read this blog.

So this was interesting... the first occupation listed on the profile that is common to people who score highest in the intrapersonal area? JUDGE.

HA! I will ever be daily seeking to understand how and when God wants me to use the gifts he has given me- to be a discerning tool and helpful counselor in His hand, not bringing condemnation. It is not my desire to bring condemnation. I do believe in bringing awareness and sometimes I do that a bit brutally. Sorry.

The author went on to state that the area of the brain that activates first for someone who scored as I did is responsible for free will. Free will is such an amazing concept born in the heart of God that I marvel about it often and refer to it in the introduction to this blog. It deserves its own post another time.

The final important thing I am gleaning from this book is that I am to spend my time focused on living and functioning within my strengths instead of spending inordinate amounts of time trying to get my weaknesses up to par. Great, relieving, and freeing advice.

This naturally also means I should learn to value other people in their uniqueness too instead of evaluating them against the areas I am strong in. That had been a hard lesson that I learned in my marriage, when early on I felt I needed to help Cory become more like me; in reality his uniqueness is a perfect complement to mine. Had I married someone like me I would have been a very unhappy person.

Anyway.......Consider this blog a blanket apology to everyone who gets offended because of some of the things I say. We are all different. I am still in the process of learning to offer grace as readily as I am to eat it up everyday....yes,even to people who pop pills like candy and wash them down with fried sugar. Pray for me, people.


  1. Oh, my heavens...Love LOve, LOVE and totally understand this! We ARE kindred spirits and I think I need this book. :D Bless you for your transparency and honesty.

  2. Life's too short to not say EXACTLY what you mean. Sugarcoating things doesn't help anyone...